When I was a child, I had a huge fear of the dark. The fear was so bad that I would brace myself near the light switch in my bedroom, take a deep breath, and turn off the light. Immediately, I would run for my bed, only ten feet away from the switch. Once I was under my covers, I believed that I was somehow safe from the monsters and demons who lived in the dark.
Why did I believe that things exist in the dark that don’t exist in the light? To explain that, I’ll share a story about a question a bishop asked my eight-year-old daughter in 2006.
Back then, the members of my family were faithful members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (you know, the Mormons). This church believes that at eight years old, children are old enough to be baptized. Before they can be baptized, they must be scrutinized and found worthy by the bishop. As a dutiful member, when my oldest daughter turned eight, I scheduled the interview with the bishop and attended it with my daughter.
During the interview, the bishop asked my daughter, “Do you believe in Jesus Christ?”
She answered, “Sure! And Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy!”
I was so embarrassed! As soon as we got home, I explained to my daughter that Jesus is real, but the others are imaginary. She nodded the way children do when a parent explains something silly.
You’re probably wondering what this story has to do with a fear of the dark. My daughter, even though she may not have been able to verbally express it this way at the time, had concluded that Jesus and Santa had similar properties. She couldn’t see either of them. They both did things that were clearly impossible. Her parents had told her that both were real. The logic that she used to determine that Jesus is real is the same logic she used to determine that Santa and the others were real. It is the same logic that I used to determine that once the lights are off, monsters come out. After all, I, too, was taught as a child that Jesus, Santa, and the Tooth Fairy were real.
How did my daughter and I develop this process of determining reality as children? When children are taught that things in this universe exist without proof and that people use magic to accomplish impossible tasks, they develop an idea of existence in which knowing anything is impossible. That the only way to know what is real is to believe what someone else says is real.
The only thing worse than telling a child what is real is lying to them when they question what is real. Take, for example, the Tooth-Fairy test that every child conducts. The child, through his own process of testing reality, puts a tooth under his pillow without telling his parents. When morning comes and he still has the tooth, he reveals his test to his parents. Proud of the deployment of the scientific method that has demonstrated that the Tooth Fairy doesn’t exist, he eagerly awaits congratulations from his parents. Sadly, instead of praising their child for his clever experiment, they make up a silly explanation such as, “The tooth fairy often gets busy. She has had an unusual amount of tooth requests lately. You watch. She’ll get to your tooth tonight.” This completely destroys the child’s experiment. The parents justify their actions so that they can have their magical memory or so their child can live in a magical world just a little longer. Yet it only reinforces the child’s belief that reality is unintelligible.
What view of the world does a child have who has been raised this way? That the world is unknowable. That the mind is not the tool that man uses to perceive reality. That monsters can indeed lurk in the dark.
What kind of adults does this upbringing create? Adults with the same belief of existence as they had as a child. Only now, as adults with their own money to spend (and their own children to raise), they are prey to anyone with a magical cure.
- Try my essential oils! There is one for every kind of ailment. Let me tell you about multi-level marketing. Buy my crystals! They have energy which can reduce your suffering, inspire creativity, and do anything else you can think of. Buy this dream catcher! It will prevent nightmares and help you sleep better.
Disclaimer: I am not against essential oils, stones, or dream catchers. Stones and dream catchers are very pretty. Essential oils are soothing and smell nice. I am against deceiving people into believing that they can be used for mystical and otherwise unexplainable healing.
- Beware of the retrograde motion of Mars! Buy my book to show you how to avoid it. Saturn is returning to the place in the sky where it was when you were born! Buy this daily horoscope and consult books on astrology to learn about the great change coming in your life.
- I am psychic! Let me tell you your future by reading your palm or by turning over these tarot cards. Maybe we can consult the spirit board. Just ask it questions, and the planchette will point to letters to spell out the answer.
- I took a picture of Bigfoot. I can track the chupacabra. This area is known to have sightings of the abominable snowman. Here is where the Loch Ness monster lives! I can use this scientific equipment to find ghosts in your house. Buy this t-shirt. Pay me a fee, and you too can take part in this great, mysterious world!
- And my personal favorite: Come to my church and pay me ten percent of your income, or better yet, sign over your property to me. If you do, God won’t send you to hell.
As the saying goes: “Religion was invented when the first con man met the first fool.”
Phrases that come with religion are just as or equally harmful.
- God works in mysterious ways.
- Everything happens for a reason.
- When God closes a door, he opens a window.
- Surrender yourself to God. Or, at least, me, his chosen servant. Do Everything that I tell you to do, and God will bless you.
Religious or not, when people ask you to believe something that they cannot prove through reason, they are asking you to turn off your brain and submit yourself to their will.
What can a person do if he has been raised to believe that anything and everything becomes real the moment someone states that it is? Until he develops a true understanding of reality, he will continue to believe in fairy tales and give his money to the next con man and even worse, to teach his own children that such things are real.
Yes, I did say “a true understanding of reality.” There is only one reality. You and I both live in it. There isn’t a reality for you and a different one for me. We all live on earth. The sun rises in the east and sets in the west for everyone. Everyone requires oxygen to breathe. Gravity affects all of us the same way. If you don’t believe me, step off a single stair and observe which direction your body leans toward.
How do we determine what is real and what is not? How do we recognize reality? We must use our mind. Our mind is our only means of survival. If we fail to use it, we risk losing everything we have ever worked for, including our very lives. Carl Sagan, in the last interview before his death, said:
Science is more than a body of knowledge. It is a way of thinking; a way of skeptically interrogating the universe with a fine understanding of human fallibility. If we are not able to ask skeptical questions, to interrogate those who tell us that something is true, to be skeptical of those in authority, then we are up for grabs for the next charlatan (political or religious) who comes rambling along.
27 May 1996, interview with Charlie Rose, USA
How does one use the scientific method to build knowledge, especially if we are starting from scratch? We must use our senses to determine what is real. We must touch, taste, smell, view, and hear things. Then, we must use our minds to process these sensations to form concepts and facts. We can combine concepts together into abstract ideas to form theories that can be tested and repeated by others. The repetition by others is an important aspect. If others can’t repeat your experience and get the same result, there is a flaw in the interpretation of the sensory data.
When we implement this way of thinking, we will recognize that what exists in the light is exactly what exists in the dark.
Some of you reading this might be thinking, “What a jerk! Why is he suggesting that we remove the things that make a child’s life magical and happy? Santa Claus and the other legends are essential to a child’s early development!” I shall answer your question with a brief description of a few of these legends.
Santa Claus was just a story in America until 1902 when L. Frank Baum–author of The Wizard of Oz, whose theme, ironically, centers on the idea of exposing conmen and accepting reality–wrote a story called The Life Adventures of Santa Claus. In the 1930s, Coca-Cola chose to use Santa Claus’s image to manipulate people into buying more Coke. (It’s fascinating that the image of Santa Claus as we know it is less than a hundred years old.) So if children need Santa Claus on Christmas to have a happy childhood, how were children happy before 1930, and especially before 1902?
Are children happy, and do they experience a magical moment when Santa Claus forgets about them one year? Are they happy when they ask their parents how he can possibly visit over a billion homes in a single night? And are they happy when they discover that the boy down the street who has been bullying them all year got just as many presents when he clearly wasn’t nice? How do parents explain those situations without causing the child to stop thinking? How does a child continue to live with the correct sense of justice and morality when the naughty kids get as many presents even after all the songs and poems said they wouldn’t?
Like Santa Claus, the tooth fairy has several legends going back hundreds of years. Some of those legends are more gruesome than others. It wasn’t until 1908 when a small article appeared in the Chicago Tribune:
Many a refractory child will allow a loose tooth to be removed if he knows about the Tooth Fairy. If he takes his little tooth and puts it under the pillow when he goes to bed the Tooth Fairy will come in the night and take it away, and in its place will leave some little gift. It is a nice plan for mothers to visit the 5-cent counter and lay in a supply of articles to be used on such occasions.
Lillian Brown (27 September 1908). “Tooth Fairy”. Chicago Daily Tribune. Retrieved 15 June 2015.
The introductory rate for a tooth in its 1908 inception? Five cents.
How were children happy before 1908? Are they happy when they gather on the playground at recess and compare the money the tooth fairy gave one child to the money she gave another? How do the parents explain that? What devices do they use to get the child to continue believing?
And the Easter Bunny? Surprisingly, the Easter Bunny is the oldest of the three legends. He got his start in a Lutheran community in 1682. The Easter Bunny tradition was brought to the United States shortly thereafter when these German immigrants settled the Pennsylvania-Dutch areas
Before you take up your pitchforks and torches to hunt me down, I must clarify that I am not calling for an end to the use of mythical figures in our holidays. What I am proposing is that we stop indoctrinating our children with the notion that these figures are real. These figures can still have value to children in their imagination. Memories can still be magical in the realm of make believe. There is no harm in telling stories and being entertained by stories as long as the audience (and often the teller) understand that the stories are fiction.
The harm comes when we manipulate children (and continue to manipulate adults) into believing things that are not true. When we force children to accept contradictions and false premises, we are teaching them that they live in a hostile universe that can’t be understood, that there is no way to make sense of the world that can’t possibly be understood. A fear of the dark is just a symptom. An adult who cannot perceive reality correctly or think rationally is the result.
Ethan's Journal 